Choices are even harder for me...if they are for others.

(I started this yesterday and was interrupted by events of the day) Last Monday I was informed that my father's brother had died, joining my father in the great by-and-by. Since I have always been considered (until very recently) the most responsible of my grandfather's grandkids, and since he shows a definite bias towards preferring my company, I was asked to help break the news to him that he would be burying a second child. It was as awful as I expected for him and me at least initially. But the secondary implications of my Uncle's death would be a much harder episode to deal with. I had known that my Uncle had power-of-attorney over my grandfather for his now almost non-existant ability to care for himself. I had also been told my my grandfather in the not so recent past that I was the executor to his will. It turns out I was removed as executor, according to my cousin Travis, because I was Trans. However, I also found out that I was the alternate (because of my Uncle's Stage IV cancer) on the power-of-attorney for my grandfather. So now I am responsible for managing my grandfather's estate so as to keep him financially able to provide for himself. But there was a 'rider' of sorts on the POA. He wishes no effort be spared in keeping him in his home until the end. He has grown increasingly problematic over the past 2 months. He has physically and verbally assaulted his caregivers on many occasions and he refuses to stay in bed and when he tries to get up and walk by himself he falls... resulting in blunt force traumas all over his body. Last Friday he looked as if he was on the losing end of a bar brawl. Many times when he falls or becomes violent 911 has to be called in order to restore the situation to normal whether that means sedation or just getting him back into bed. He has gone through a lot of different caregivers over the past year. Some because he fired them for making him behave, and some quit because they were tired of his crap. He lives in a small town he will eventually come to the end of people willing to care for him. Probably sooner rather than later at this point.

So I have a dilemma. At what point do his wishes to be at home get outweighed by his health and the safety of his caregivers? Then there is the financial dilemma. His liquid assets had been used up before I became responsible. He has many rental houses. But there has been no one to manage them and so there are only three generating income currently. The real estate market is at rock bottom right now and so liquidating a house or two if it can be done at all will be done for a loss. So do I make radical changes and bring in a management company with his end approaching? And then there were the 'events of the day....'